Do you ever get that feeling when everything around you is so quiet that you could hear a pin drop, but you feel like you could take on the world? No? Oh, well I guess that's just me but the last few nights have been that way for me. I guess it really started though on Friday night, I was working the closing shift and as I walked out the door on a delivery I could just feel the calm around me. The dark has an effect on me that I can't quite describe. I don't feel rushed, and I feel so much more calm at night than I do during the day. Friday night as I was walking out of the store it was snowing lightly I believe, the parking lot was lit by lamps and it was quiet. The parking lot is never quiet and I just felt this reassurance that everything would settle down soon. Settle down as in I would get into a good routine with school and work. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and can't brush the feeling that I'm somehow going to forget something, or something's going to blow up in my face. But these nights, reassure me that everything is possible. I love to go out at night and just sit in the silence and take it all in, streets are quiet and I can be alone with my thoughts(as much as I hate that phrase, it's true.) I don't like to talk to others about my thoughts, and I rarely ever externalize my thoughts unless I'm ranting about something.
From now on I'm calling those nights "Quiet Innocence" where the night is young, and I feel good about myself. Sometimes it's those kind of nights that get me through the week. Friday night as I was walking out of the store, I was a little frazzled because of the homework I knew I needed to get done, but I realized at that moment that if I just breathe everything will work itself out.
I need more of these nights in my life. Where I can just sit outside and enjoy the stars, the moon, and my thoughts. Unfortunately it looks like that might be a few months before I will willingly go outside at night.
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