Yes, I've been obsessively thinking about anything and everything lately. Mainly life and my classes here, whether this is truly where I should be right now, whether I should transfer, whether college is right for me(at least a four year), and the amount that I'm missing being home and the people that are there.
Never in my life have I been this homesick, I feel like I didn't miss my family as much last year but maybe I did but just didn't recognize the feelings. And I'm not sure if it's where I'm at now surrounding wise, and that I don't have all my friends on the same floor(which sounds crazy, but the thought has crossed my mind) or whether it's just that this truly isn't where I'm suppose to be, and if it isn't then where am I suppose to be? I've been thinking a lot about whether I should transfer, or whether I think this is just a "phase" that I'm going through(which I doubt.)
Right now, I'm still thinking a four year is the right move but I have no idea, maybe anthropology isn't what I want to do, but honestly the only subject I consistently got good grades in in high school was History, so if not anthro, then it's got to be history. When I'm hanging out with friends here, I don't miss home but obviously I'm not hanging out with friends all the time so when I'm not my thoughts can turn to home and then I get homesick, it's just a vicious circle that I don't want to be in.
This weekend I'm going home, it's funny how I thought I wasn't going to go home until October and then I got here and became homesick and am now going home two weeks into the school year. I'm so looking forward to it, like as soon as I decided I was going home I was so excited.
I called my mom this past Thursday and it was the best phone call I've ever had we didn't talk for that long but it was exactly what I needed and I just liked hearing her voice. =]
I'm officially dropping one of my classes, it just was definitely not what I expected it to be, and I think life will be a lot easier without the class. However I'm still searching for a class to fill it with, and haven't found anything of interest yet, and I'm hoping if I do take just 12 credits I won't be bored this semester.
For now, it's time for homework.
No comments:
Post a Comment